|Have I Offended You?|
|Summary:||Tiaryn and Einar discuss their feelings and their futures.|
|Related Logs:||Some which I will link when I have the time. If I remember.|
|Einar's Room at the Rockcliff, Terrick's Roost|
|Standard inn room. Bed, chair, window, stuff. Crucially, not a tent.|
|Wed Jul 18, 289|
With being a habitual early riser, it is not unknown for Einar to retire relatively early of an evening. Tonight is no exception from that and having excused himself from a table in the main inn he's made is way back to his room to finish a few small tasks and then sleep. The room itself is pretty much the same as any other in the Inn and his gear takes up the space in one corner, leathers, sword, crossbow and the like. Having not yet turned in the door is still slightly ajar and he's sat on the edge of his bed reading through a few sheets of paper.
Tia has been thinking which is perhaps never a good thing. But nevertheless, she has. And so, there is a slight knock at the door, followed by a soft, "Einar? Are you available to talk?" in a voice all too recognisable as Tia's, of course. She has her maid and guard with her, standing back a bit and waiting patiently. Tia does not move to open the door or to step into the room until she hears from Einar.
Einar glances upwards at the sound of the knock, almost about to call 'Come in'. The sound of Tia's voice though makes him pause so he can listen, although by the time she's finished he's already on his feet and opening the door for her. Stepping back to give her and those with her space to enter he smiles, pleased to see his good-sister, "of course, Tia, please take a seat. I'm afraid though that I can not offer much in the way of refreshments, I've generally just been going to the common room for that sort of thing."
"No, that's fine, I'd have to say the same, as well," Tia replies, as she steps in, once offered. The maid steps in as well, though the guard stays at the door, with a nod for Einar. He doesn't want to hear, it seems. Bethy also stays by the door, leaning against it, as she tries to stay out of hearing range more or less. But she's there for propriety's sake and doing her job well. Tia does move to take a seat, with a bit of a smile. "I apologize for intruding," she adds, as she smooths her skirts absently. "but I wanted to see if you are doing well?"
Neither the guard nor Bethy need worry themselves, Einar is not about to jump his sister, or actually even consider it as an option. Their diligence is however noted and approved off. Leaving them be he turns and sits again on the edge of the bed, shifting the few pieces of paper off onto the small table near by. "It's no intrusion," he answers as he shifts slightly so that he can more easily face her chair, "although half an hour later and you might have found me asleep." As for the specific question, he nods once and continues to smile as he replies, "I am thank you, and yourself?"
Tia smiles at that. "Had there been no answer, I'd simply have retired to my own room and tried again another time," she says. She pauses a moment, a little awkwardly, and then she takes a breath, but she does answer his question first. "I'm - well, I'm mostly okay, I think," she says. Her eyes for a moment show a haunted look, and she looks a little tired, but who can say why? "I miss the music though - it's hard to keep from thinking too much without it."
Since Tia does not seem to be showing the urgency that she might were this an emergency visit, Einar nods easily enough at her answer. "Probably wise, although you do know that should the need arise then you can wake me, yes?" That addressed he moves on, his expression turning somewhat more towards supportive than the simple pleasure it had shown before. "I think, perhaps, when we are next in Seagard or Stonebride, that it might be an idea to look for a replacement for you. I doubt the trade will reach this far but you should not be without for longer than is absolutely necessary."
"Were it an emergency I would not hesitate, but today, while important, I do not think this is the sort of thing that needs to be urgent," Tia acknowledges. "But rest assured, if the inn is burning down, I will wake you." There is a bit of teasing there, a ghost of a smile curving her lip. She sighs then, and says, "I think that I would very much appreciate that. Or else I might get that bard fellow to teach me to play lute." A pause as she considers how to bring up the next topic, but she's not finding a good segue, so she sort of rushes in. "Einar, you can tell me I'm being foolish, and maybe it is so. I cannot help but feel that you are at times avoiding me? And I would like to know what it is that I have done to offend you?"
"And I you should our positions be reversed," Einar acknowledges, his easy smile returning slowly. "I am not sure when I will have enough free time in one go to make the ride, but should I find myself in such a position I will make sure to come and find you immediately. Stonebridge and back can be done in a day after all, although I do not know what the market there is like for such items though. I could ask my cousins from Broadmoor if you'd like though, they may have a better idea of availability this far south." The new topic though draws him short and causes his expression to switch to concern. Making sure he's looking directly at her he says firmly, "You have done no such thing Tia.” Reaching forward he aims to take her hand in his, assuming she’ll let him, “I give you my word, before both your gods and mine."
Tia does meet Einar's gaze and she lets him take her hand, but now her expression turns very puzzled. "I don't understand, Einar. Am I wrong that there have been times when you have been avoiding me?" she asks, her head tilting slightly as she watches him closely. "And if I have not offended you, then - is there some secret you are not to tell me, that springs too closely to your lips at times? Or, is it entirely in my imagination?" She sounds doubtful at that last, quite firmly believing that it is not at all her imagination, but well, perhaps she is reading too much into absentminded obliviousness.
Sandwiching her one hand between his two, Einar continues as earnestly as before. “Not you Tia and there are no secrets, you have my word on that as well. It’s just..” He trails off there, leaning back a bit an letting her hand go free again. Struggling to work out exactly that to say he runs one hand across his chin, barely noticing the day’s growth there present. “It’s just memories,” he finally admits before pushing himself to his feet and moving towards the small window. “From before King Robert’s War, when you and my brother were.. were like you and Ser Saethwyr are now. I didn’t want you to know though, in case it made you sad again.”
Tia's expression gets a little more confuzzled, as she listens to Einar. "Oh," she says, and then after a moment, understanding clicks. Her eyes widen, her expression clears of the confusion only to switch to surprise. "OH! Einar, I'm sorry," she then says, though she's clearly still processing the information. She reaches out now for his hand. "Einar, that was almost seven years ago. Still a little bit stunned by this revelation. "You are very loyal, nobody can deny that." She bites her lower lip for a moment, watching Einar, as she thinks what to say. "So, it's not me, and it's not Ser Saethwyr, it's just the two of us together, I - well, this might take me some thinking."
Einar steps closer ahgain, so he can take her outstretched hand and covers it once again with both of his. "It's not loyalty," he admits, head ever so slightly bowed, "it's just a reminder of the loss." He's msotly stealing Corrie's phrasing at this point, but it's better than any he'd managed by himself. "Just promise me you won't change anything on my behalf. You deserve this, after everything."
Tia thinks about that for a moment, getting to her feet, so she can move a little closer to Einar. In fact, she also moves her second hand over, so now there are four hands sort of jumbled together. "It - is, I can't deny that. And you know that if Connell were still here, things would be very different." Incredibly different by far, as Tia would probably have two or three children by now, just to start with. That though actually brings a rueful look to her face. "But - I just - he's gone, and I can't do anything to get him back. And I don't think he'd want me to be alone and sad forever. Nor would he want you sad forever either," she says slowly.
And Einar would probably be a Septon somewhere instead of his cousin's squire. Very different indeed. "I know he wouldn't" he admits freely enough, although his head is still slightly bowed, "and that why, in part, I don't want you to change anything. I think.. I just need time. I put it behind me before and I can again, I just wasn't expecting such a reminder. My head know this, my heart just hasn't caught up yet."
Tia frees one hand and then moves to give Einar a hug. "No matter what happens, you're always my brother, Einar. And I will always love Connell. Always." She leaves the but off at the end, since it won't help matters and Einar is already well aware of it. "I wasn't expecting this either; I really was caught by surprise. It's funny how it just feels right. With Quellyan, there was only a small hint. I don't know, maybe because they're related? Does that even make sense?" She shakes her head, and then she says, "I'm sorry. I didn't even think how it might impact you, and I probably should have."
Einar does not pull back from the hug but instead frees one of his own hands to return it. He figures the main probably knows them well enough by now to know there's nothing inappropriate in it. Not that that is his main thought mind, just a side one as he catches sight of her out of the corner of his eye. "Why should you have?" he asks after, mostly rhetorically. "As you said, it's been six years and if it feels right then you should go for it with my blessing." Then, in an attempt to lighten the mood a little he adds, "Just let him know that if he ever hurts you in anyway then I'll come back and invoke the right of brotherly vengeance."
Oh, the maid knows, and she's not even looking upset or anything, just amused really. Tia hugs her brother in law warmly, and then she pulls back a bit, chuckling softly. "I will, unless you would rather tell him yourself," she says. The mood so far as she is concerned lightened significantly. And also, she's quite pleased with that thought, it making her feel cared for. She does pull back from the hug eventually, searching for Einar's gaze to meet it evenly. "If it should pass that we get married, I would like you to be there, and to dance, you know."
“If I can be, I will be,” Einar promises, studiously ignoring the comment about dancing as he does so. Then, in explanation for that he continues, “I haven’t yet had time to tell you, nor anyone else for that matter, but possibly it is fitting that you hear first.” Besides Anders and Cordelya of course, but then they were in the actual conversation. Keeping hold of her hand he squeezes it gently before saying, “once I am knighted I will be leaving, and I do not know where I will end up nor how often I can return. Anders is allowing me to take the cloth.”
That gets a blink from Tia, and a searching glance, as she listens. "Oh. He is? Well, that's a good thing, isn't it? I mean, it's what you want, mostly." She doesn't even mention Einar's father, but then, she and that fellow do not precisely get along. "Though, we'll miss you, if you're not around, at least some of the time." She is not entirely sure how she feels about that, but if it's what he wants, then that's what counts. "You will write to us, when you can, yes?"
"He is," Einar confirms with a nod, "and it is, yes." He's not mentioning his father either, hoping that Anders' position as Young Lord will trump the man's claim on his future. "And I will miss you, and the others, never doubt that, not even for a second. Where ever I end up I will think of you and write when I can, or the situation merits." He finds himself short of words then and so moves forward to re-initiate the hug. It seems appropriate after all.
Tia returns the hug, and even manages to not turn into a crying fiend all over her good brother. "I can't think of someone who should more deserve to be happy, Einar. And I will support you, if it really is what you want to do." She has only a vague idea how it all works, truthfully, having not really paid too much attention to it all. Except that it seems it will merit time away from his family, a whole life of it, most likely. "If you go to become a septon, or when rather, once they - decree that you are a septon, are you then free to go where you choose?"
"In general, no," Einar confesses, "unless you choose the life of a begging brother, in which case you can wander where you will. Most though are placed where it is felt there is the greatest need, and where they can best serve." That may mean of course that he is sent as a missionary to the North or such, but there is certainly no guarantees. "Thank you though, I will hold your words close."
Tia takes a breath but she nods to that, slowly. "I see," she says. "It will definitely mean that we will miss you then. Unless of course you are sent to stonebridge or something equally in need of significant amounts of help." There's a hint of teasing there, though stonebridge does seem to be in need of - well, something. "But we will think of you often and wish you all the best. And pray the gods take care of you." She deliberately doesn't say which gods.
It's probably fair to say, that it's proximity to the North is about the only thing that might push Stonebridge up Einar's list of places he'd want to be sent to. Too much politics, and all sides would know he was born a noble and might thus try and involve him in it. He nods though, at Tia's words and then, feeling the need to lighten the mood again, states, "That is all still a while off though, for I am still squire to Anders and will finish that service before embarking upon another. There are also others I would talk to first, to see which branch of the path they would recommend and take time to come to my own decision. I fear you shall be stuck with me for a time at least."
Tia blinks at that, and then she smiles. "Really? Stuck with you? However shall I cope?" she teases. Though she does glance over at Bethy, and now she takes a breath. "I will have to sleep on it, decide how I shall manage, with you still around," she teases. "Thank you for talking to me, Einar, I - was really worried about you, and now I do feel better, even if a little sadder at the same time. Is it okay, if I tell Saethwyr? I won't, if you prefer I do not."
Einar smiles back and replies simply, "Tell him what you will, just be sure to include the bit about brotherly vengeance." The smile turns into a grin briefly before forcing itself into a yawn that he barely manages to stifle. "Now look what you've started," he replies, "you and you're talk of sleep. I think we should probably call an end to this now before I start snoring and worry your guard." Giving her hand one final, gentle squeeze he lets go before adding, "good night and sleep well."
That has Tia burst out laughing, without a doubt. She smiles, eyes looking a bit mischievous. "Oh, should you start snoring, we might have to put colour on your cheeks, just to ensure you wake up beautiful," she says. "But - I will leave you to your sleep. Rest well, good brother." She gives him one more hug, impulsively, and then adds, "And I promise to tell Saethwyr about the brotherly vengeance." Though with that, she gestures to Bethy, and the two head to the door where Jacob is lounging. Of course there's a servant or two out in the hall, ostensibly working, but really looking for gossip.